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涩郎科普:关于“喜当爹”段子编撰需要注意

最近看到不少关于“喜当爹”的段子,从一个月到九个月的版本都有。@捧腹网 为了避免段子手们免于嘲笑,也为了严谨的科学精神(当然,希望大家只记住后面一点,我们追求的是严谨的科学和缜密的思维),涩郎特意给大家科普一下这些细节:

首先,是孕妇的身形变化细节。看下图

涩郎科普:关于“喜当爹”段子编撰需要注意

从这个图我们可以看到,孕妇从第五个月开始,身体已经开始有变化了,从十月怀胎的说法来看,那种一个月就喜当爹的说法就不应该出现,谁特喵那么傻去跟一个已经九个月身孕的孕妇做剧烈运动啊,再说条件也不允许的。一般来说,九月孕期的时候,是禁止这类运动的了。六、七、八月孕期的时候倒还可以,但必须注意体位了,就是说,二个月、三个月、四个月、喜当爹的说法也应该放弃了。

然后,根据婴儿产出的时间来说,一般不足月的宝宝着急的出来也是正常的,所以,九个月就生下来的小宝宝虽然不多,但也不在稀罕之数,所以,九个月当爹的情况,如果不是小宝宝症状特别明显(俩黑人生了个白宝宝什么的)一般情况下,不能直接断定是“喜当爹”。七八个月属于小产,这个时候的宝宝孕期不足,直接体现就是不足秤没长够,体虚,医生会建议直接进育婴仓,不然宝宝很容易夭折,如果说七八个月的孕期就诞下一健壮的婴儿,那么最大的可能就是喜当爹,除此外,还是不要直接打击产房外紧张的男人脆弱的心灵。

综上所述,“喜当爹”的段子的时间一般选择编写为五个月和六个月是最为合适的。因为孕妇在已有四五个月身孕的时候,不怎么看得出,而如果孕期只有五个月或者六个月,是未完全成形还不具备生下来的资格的,这个时候其实是流产打胎的时期,如果交往五六个月就有娃,那么恭喜了,一定是“喜当爹”。

所以,各位段子手们,“喜当爹”的段子最佳时间为五、六个月,除此之外,要么,会被骂脑残(一、二、三、四个月的),要么会被质疑(七、八、九个月的)。

为了严谨的科学,大家编撰、修改、发布段子的时候,请稍微注意一下细节。

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